


Let me be Selfish

by TheRaadicalKid



Category: Legacies (TV 2018)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, Flashbacks, Some Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-29
Updated: 2018-12-29
Packaged: 2019-09-30 00:17:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17213546
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheRaadicalKid/pseuds/TheRaadicalKid
Summary: set after 1x06Penelope Park is a bitch they sayPenelope Park is satan they sayPenelope Park is selfish she herself saysbut they don’t know really know what happened and why. do they?my version of what happened after the kiss, why and how they break up and how they find their way back to each other.i suck at giving summaries but give it a try perhaps?





	Let me be Selfish

“I hate you.”

 

Nothing hurts more than hearing those words from the one person Penelope Park truly cares about. The one person whose words matter the most. Nothing hurts more than knowing she had caused this. That is was all her doing.

 

“I know.” She replies, faking a smile to hide the pain.

 

Penelope couldn’t really blame Josie for hating her. For losing the love she once had for Penelope. After all, she made sure that this would happen. She made sure that Josie wouldn’t want to be in a relationship with her. Not even as friends.

 

This wasn’t supposed to be happening. She tries to reason to herself that she can’t do this. She can’t be having sex with Josie. But after what has happened tonight, rational thoughts just seems to fade away. She almost lost Josie. And for a moment there, Penelope would have given up. She would have given up everything just to be with Josie again. To be with the person she’s madly and deeply in love with.

 

But no. She can’t do that to Josie. She can’t put herself or more importantly Josie through that again.

 

“wait.” Penelope pants, pulling away from their heated kiss.

 

She reaches over the lamp and turns the lights off, making everything pitch black.

 

“Perfect.” She says, kissing Josie again.

 

Penelope just can’t take it. She can’t have sex with her ex and see the anger in those eyes. She can’t bear to see... that.

 

////

 

“I hate you.” Josie says, with so much bitterness.

 

There’s a fine like between hate and love. Josie doesn’t really know if she hates Penelope. If she could ever hate her. All she knows is she hates what Penelope did. For breaking up with her with no real reason. For giving her bullshit excuses. She hates how her ex somehow the light out of her. how she left and took a piece of Josie that made her feel incomplete every single dat. Josie hates the fact that it’s so hard for her to move on from her when Penelope make it seem so easy.

 

How can she still not move on when Penelope didn’t even seem to care at all?

 

She hate it. She hates this. And maybe. Just maybe she hates her too.

 

Maybe.

 

She knows she shouldn’t be doing this. That this is all fun and games for Penelope. But there was her ex right there kissing her. Penelope had saved her. She had protected her. And for a moment there, everything felt right. Everything felt normal. Everything felt complete.

 

For the first time in a long time she felt like she had Penelope again. Her Penelope.

 

She knows it’s gonna hurt tomorrow and she hates herself because after everything. After everything she still wants this. She still wants this even if Penelope would go back to being a bitch to her the next morning. She knows this.

 

But if she could just have this feeling even for a few hours then screw the right thing.

 

“wait.” Penelope pulls back as she turns off the lights.

 

Josie wipes her tears before Penelope could notice them. She can’t even look at her. Josie wonders what did she ever do for Penelope to hate her like that. No, not hate. Because hate requires you care about something enough to hate it.

 

But Josie is pretty sure Penelope Park doesn’t care about anything anymore.

 

///

 

_Josie wakes up the sound of birds chirping, the feeling of windy morning haze. She wakes up to the smell of flowers around her, the sun on her faces but most importantly, in the arms of someone that made her feel most secure._

 

_“mmmm” Josie groans, her smile radiating. She could feel Penelope staring at her like she always does. “how long have you been up?”_

 

_”a while.” Penelope pulls her closer, taking in her girlfriend’s scent. “and good morning to you, my beautiful sunshine.”_

 

_Waking up next to Penelope Park always feels like that.— A beautiful sunshine. Literally and Figuratively. She doesn’t know why but Penelope is always the first one up and her girlfriend would use magic to make it seem like they’re in the middle of this beautiful field of flowers where Caroline used to take the twins when they were younger. It was Josie’s favorite place._

 

“I love you.” Penelope whispers, leaving a kiss on Josie’s shoulder blades.

 

i _love you_

_i love you_

_i love you_

 

_Penelope continues punctuating every i love you’s with a kiss on Josie’s body._

 

_“Penny! Stop! Sto–“ Josie screams, giggling. She turns to face her girlfriend and cups Penelope’s face. How can she be so lucky and happy and in love all at the same time, she thinks. “You know that tickles, babe!”_

 

_Penelope gives her the sweetest smile and pulls her for a kiss, not caring about their morning breath. “I love you.”_

 

_“I love you too, you soft cheesy dork.”_

 

_“um excuse me.” Penelope scoffs, “1. I’m far from soft. 2. Cheesy??? I don’t even know what that is.”_

 

_“and 3. I’m no dork. Have you met me, J? Penelope Park? A soft cheesy dork? Psh” Penelope add, snapping her finger to undo the magic she made in the room._

 

_She stands up to get dressed only for Josie to pull her back in bed._

 

_“Josie!” Penelope giggles as her girlfriend straddles her”_

 

_“Oh, You know you’re all those things, Penny. But don’t worry your reputation and secret are safe with me.”_

 

_“Oh is it huh? Penelope turns their position around and starts tickling Josie non stop._

 

_”Penny. oh my god stop! st–“_

 

“JOSSIEEEEE SALTZMAN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?”

 

That’s when Josie really wakes up with a pillow thrown at her face with no other than her twin sister.

 

“I just saw Penelope Park come out of our room doing the walk of shame! oh you’ve got to be kidding me! please tell me it’s not what i’m thinking!”

 

Disappointment. That’s what Josie feels right now. She’s disappointed at herself because ofcourse she knew. She knew last night was just... it was meaningless for Penelope. She knew.

 

Disappointed because ofcourse Lizzie had to wake her up. Ofcourse she had to dream about her memories with Penelope. Ofcourse she had to get reminded of how happy they used to be only for reality to hit her on the face.

 

“I know I really need to move on.” She knows she’s said this many times but this time it’s true. This time she’s really gonna make herself move on. This time she really is.

 

///

 

“what the hell’s your problem Kaleb?!”

 

“hey, hey” Hope comes in between Penelope and Kaleb, trying to break up the fight. “walk away Kaleb.”

 

“That bitch started it!”

 

“I said walk away. Walk the fuck away.”

 

“This aint over, Penelope.”

 

“Boohoo. I’m shaking scared.” Penelope spats out, making a sarcastic face to piss off Kaleb even more.

 

Hope only glares at her, shaking her head.

 

“What? Just because do each other favors here and there doesn’t make us friends, Hope. Stop acting like I owe you an explanation to anything I do. More importantly, stop acting like my friend.”

 

Penelope spats, pulling her arm off Hope’s grip and heads towards her room. This morning isn’t exactly going well. She knows it’s not Hope’s fault and of course she considers Hope her friend even if they both deny it but today is just not the time.

 

She thought she had finally gotten the peace and quiet when she reached her room but apparently not because Hope came right busting in.

 

“Okay, I’m gonna let that pass what you said back there because I know this about Josie.”

 

“It’s n–“

 

“Shhh. I’m not done.” Hope cuts her off before she could even deny everything being about her ex girlfriend. “I know you’re usually a bitch to everyone including me but this morning you’re extra bitchy. Bitchier than usual and only one person could do that. So spill. What happened?”

 

Penelope sighs. It was pointless to even deny it now. She doesn’t exactly know when or how it happened but apparently Hope is too fluent now when it comes to speaking Penelope-Josie language. All she knows that Hope was there for her right after she broke up with Josie and they have this weird friendship thing going on since then that she doesn’t think anyone even notices.

 

“I slept with her.”

 

“Penelope!”

 

“Bitch I know. I know.”

 

“So are you trying to undo what you did? is that it? are you trying to get her back?”

 

“No. And it wouldn’t even matter even if I tried. She hates me.”

 

“You could tell her how you feel you know. Maybe that would change things. Maybe you should have been the one who gave her the necklace you told me to put in her room.”

 

It took a long time for Penelope to find that specific talisman and when she finally did Josie and her were already broken up. It was the perfect gift and thankfully it had protected Josie when she couldn’t, when she could have been too late.

 

“Make Quiet Things Heard.” Josie whispers. “she would have never accepted it if she knew it was from me.”

 

Penelope knows this. She knows Josie wants nothing to do that involves Penelope. She had gone out of her way to avoid her. It was only Penelope who kept interacting to make Josie like her less. And she did.

 

Penelope knows this is plan all along. This is what she wanted. For Josie to hate her. This is what she intended.

 

But she didn’t mean for it to hurt like this.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> hi. idk really know how many chapters ill make this into. all i know is the ending. but anyways lemme know what you think?
> 
> also, i write this in my NOTES and dont proof read anymore bc its time consuming and im NO expert in writing or whatsoever so please excuse all my typo/grammar errors. all mistakes are mine.


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